Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP