Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Randomize
