This dress was meant to end up on your floor
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
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