If you die in college, do you die in real life?
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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