can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
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