So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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