Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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