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I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
