I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
