is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?