well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
