Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
i just google imaged poop.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
