There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Everything about him screamed your future.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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