So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
