Your face is a jimmy john
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
