respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Randomize