Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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