my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Ketchup is God's man juice
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
