Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Randomize