Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
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