you traded sex for a burrito?
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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