Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I just gift wrapped bread.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
