how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Randomize
