she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
