My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Randomize
