i barfeds in our rink
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
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