You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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