dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
