At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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