Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
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im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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