Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
