Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
high people should be assigned attendants
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Randomize
