I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
if only i could text you this smell
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
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