I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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