so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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