You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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