I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Everclear isn't food dammit
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
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