so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
