life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Randomize
