That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't judge my taste in strippers
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize