SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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