After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
