I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize