Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
"it" just moved
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
