I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
