I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
