Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
They should really pass out barf bags in church
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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