I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
