I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
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