And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Randomize