Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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